Wednesday, April 19, 2023


These little gits infest level 2 of my #Dungeon23 and probably some of level 3 too.

Friday, April 14, 2023

Dungeon23: 083-103

#Dungeon23 rumbles on!

This part of the complex is the home of a clan of FERAL DWARFS. These are your standard fantasy dwarfs, except each carries a pair of serrated daggers instead of the traditional battle axe or warhammer, and they look and smell like they've been sleeping in a bin. Feral they may be but they retain their cousins' aptitude for architecture and are aware of all the secret doors in their area.

The FERAL DWARFS hate the *ROBES because the *ROBES keep abducting them and feeding them to the creature in location 13.

If your campaign has traditional fantasy dwarfs then they may know about their feral cousins, or the existence of the wretches may come as a complete surprise. Either way, your dwarfs are disgusted by them.

WURRLAN, the FERAL DWARF BOSS, roams between locations 87, 88, 92, and 95. He has a 25% chance of appearing in any one of those locations. Any FERAL DWARFS in the same location use his Morale score instead of their own.

WURRLAN, keeping the troops in order: Armour 14 (as leather), Move 60', 3 Hit Dice, 11hp, double daggers 1d4/1d4, Morale 10.
WURRLAN carries a glowing green potion; if he drinks it, he turns into a huge glowing muscular brute for 1d12 Turns. Use the statistics for a hill giant.

83. The entire north wall is taken up with elaborate abstract carvings, decorated with precious metals. The gilding is worth 500sp in raw materials but it is difficult to remove and the task is lengthy. Each 5' wall section takes 2d6 hours and provides a maximum of 100sp of foil; roll 1d100 to see how much is recovered.

84. Carvings similar to those in 83 once existed here, but not only has the gilding been removed but the carvings have been damaged by some sort of blade.

85. This was once a grand hall but the floor is uneven where a mosaic has been torn up and destroyed, and gruesome mobiles made out of bones hang from cords criss-crossing the room at a height of about 6'. The bones clack and tinkle gently in the breeze. Characters larger than a dwarf or halfling moving through the room at more than half speed disturb the mobiles, and the FERAL DWARFS in location 88 come to investigate.

86. It seems that the FERAL DWARFS have been using this room as a toilet.

87. Six FERAL DWARFS hang around in here, being disgusting. There are also a couple of empty chests; these are intended for the trap in 90.

88. A vaguely organised unit of eight FERAL DWARF warriors lives in this room, watching over both the Bluestone Door to the south, and the entrance hall to the north.

89. An altar, about 8' by 4' by 4', made of black stone, struck through with veins of some unknown mineral; the veins shift along the spectrum from red to violet and back again, taking about a minute for each pass. Playing music in the room causes the colours to shift in time with the tune, but the effect does not seem to be magical.

90. A chest sits against the eastern wall. There are faint brownish stains across the floor and a few splinters of wood scattered about. If the chest is opened, the ceiling falls, crushing the chest and anyone in the room that fails a save versus Breath Weapon. The ceiling then takes about a minute to retract, making a terrible grinding noise as it goes, then the FERAL DWARFS from room 88 come to replace the chest and reset the trigger mechanism.
Beneath the chest is a hidden floor panel concealing a genuine chest containing 1000sp. The FERAL DWARFS have no idea it is there.

91. The secret door is locked and the key is held by the FERAL DWARF LEADER in 100. Inside the room is an enormoous python, painted with strange symbols and with a blue gem set in its forehead. It is immortal and has been locked in the room for decades; the FERAL DWARFS have forgotten where it came from but do remember that it's dangerous.

UNDYING HOLY PYTHON, grumpy and hungry: Armour 12, Move 90', 5 Hit Dice, 18hp, bite 1d4 + constriction, Morale 8.
If the bite hits, the slithering saint wraps around the target and squeezes for 2d4 automatic damage that Round and every Round thereafter.
The gem is an aquamarine worth 50sp, and the snake has a Bluestone Key in its belly, if anyone cares to look.

92. Eight FERAL DWARFS occupy this stone landing, spitting -- and worse -- over the edge. The wooden stairs down to XX look flimsy and rickety but are in fact quite firm. The FERAL DWARFS from room 95 respond to any disturbances here.

93. The floor and walls are blotched with sooty marks as if a sequence of fireballs have gone off in here. Which is probably what happened.

94. Rough images of skulls have been daubed across the floor and walls -- although no higher than 5' -- in what seems to be a mixture of bodily excretions and fluids. Anyone looking for logic or a pattern will see none, but will notice that there is a greater concentration of skulls in the north-east corner.

95. Seven FERAL DWARFS marinade in their own stench here, ready to respond to disturbances in 92 or 100.

96. A fortified room with arrow slits looking out over the chasm.

97. Also a fortified room with arrow slits looking out over the chasm.

98. The spiral staircase down to XX is enclosed in a steel cage; the door is unlocked. The third step is trapped, turning the staircase into a slide; characters on the stairs should save versus Paralysation or tumble into location XX in a discombobulated state, automatically surprised by the denizens there. Anyone rolling a 1 also takes 1d6 damage.

99. ROBES stand guard here, watching the Bluestone Door to the north, although nothing has ever come from that direction in all their time guarding it.

100. The corpulent, pale, and worst of all, naked, FERAL DWARF LEADER lounges on a pile of coins -- 500sp and 600gp -- in the centre of the room, attended by 11 FERAL DWARFS. A faded tapestry conceals the secret door to 101.

YURK BLORG, the biggest beard, and the dirtiest: Armour 16 (thick folds of flab, as chain), Move 60', 7 Hit Dice, 25hp, double daggers 1d4+1/1d4+1, Morale 9.

If necessary, BLORG can call on more FERAL DWARFS from location 95.

101. The FERAL DWARF treasury. 4000pp and a locked metal box containing nine gems:
Heamatite, worth 500sp.
Shaped coral, worth 10sp.
A blue diamond, worth 500sp.
An emerald, worth 100sp.
A spectacular agate geode, worth 500sp.
A bloodstone, worth 10sp.
A black diamond, worth 500sp.
Shaped feldspar, worth 10sp.
A carnelian, worth 500sp.
This last is one of the jewels from the CROWN OF ETLUZ PEQZUS.

102. Also also a fortified room with arrow slits looking out over the chasm.

103. Also also also a fortified room, but with no arrow slits looking out over the chasm. A flagstone in the south-east corner conceals a bag containing 600sp; the FERAL DWARF BOSS hid it there and didn't tell anyone.

Sunday, April 02, 2023

Growing In Unexpected Places

Perhaps you read this article in The New Yorker, googled "Psychic Doomsday Cultists Semi-Accidentally Summoned an Alien Machine That Is Eating the World and Shitting Out a New One!", and were brought here.

Welcome! That's the tagline for my role-playing adventure The Seed, published in 2021 by Games Omnivorous. Alas, at the time of writing it is out of print, but you can get it in pdf here.

I have other rpg books you can buy in pdf here and in print here and here. None of those have been featured in The New Yorker. Yet.